Angels without wings

Thirty six patients, if you’re lucky thirty two. Patient unresponsive. Patient having chest pains. Code blue. Patient with coffee ground emesis. Patient fell out of bed. Patient pass out. Family complains and demands. Doing rounds with doctors. Carrying out doctor’s order, critical lab values, not to mention charting and documentations.  It doesn’t happen all at the same time, but sometimes it does. That’s how a typical day of a nurse is. Specially those that works in a long term care facility. 

Sometimes I ask myself, is it worth it? I had doubt my profession many times. Going home very exhausted and felt very unappreciated. In the first month that I worked as a charge nurse, I felt like giving up. Stress with how am I going to finish passing medication within the two hour period on top of answering phone calls, and attending to families concern.

“This is not for me,” I said. 

One day while doing my  medication pass, I was greeted by a warm smile by one of my patient, she told me thoughtfully, “Thank you for all you do.” And in that moment, I realized, “This is why I became a nurse, this is what I signed for.” Seeing your patient  was able to walk again. Patients that weren't able to talk or see, but touches your hands when you’re taking care of them. Thank you notes from families and chocolates as a sign of appreciation. Knowing that you’re one of the instrument that God used to help them eases their pains and aches. Hugs from families that really appreciates your care for their parents are some of the reasons why I chose to stay with this vocation. Yes, nursing requires patients and a lot of dedications. It can be very stressful at times. But going home knowing that you were able to touch life is a very rewarding feeling.